The Science of Setting Goals

The Science of Setting Goals

What happens in our heads when we set goals?

Apparently a lot more than you’d think. Goal setting isn’t quite so simple as deciding on the things you’d like to accomplish and working towards them.

According to the research of psychologists, neurologists, and other scientists, setting a goal invests ourselves into the target as if we’d already accomplished it. That is, by setting something as a goal, however small or large, however near or far in the future, a part of our brain believes that desired outcome is an essential part of who we are – setting up the conditions that drive us to work towards the goals to fulfill the brain’s self-image.

Apparently the brain cannot distinguish between things we want and things we have. Neurologically, then, our brains treat the failure to achieve our goal the same way as it treats the loss of a valued possession. And up until the moment the goal is achieved, we have failed to achieve it, setting up a constant tension that the brain seeks to resolve.

Ideally, this tension is resolved by driving us towards accomplishment. In many cases, though, the brain simply responds to the loss, causing us to feel fear, anxiety, even anguish, depending on the value of the as-yet-unattained goal.

Love, Loss, Dopamine, and Our Dreams

The brains functions are carried out by a stew of chemicals called neurotransmitters. You’ve probably heard of serotonin, which plays a key role in our emotional life – most of the effective anti-depressant medications on the market are serotonin reuptake inhibitors, meaning they regulate serotonin levels in the brain leading to more stable moods.

Somewhat less well-known is another neurotransmitter, dopamine. Among other things, dopamine acts as a motivator, creating a sensation of pleasure when the brain is stimulated by achievement. Dopamine is also involved in maintaining attention – some forms of ADHD are linked to irregular responses to dopamine.

So dopamine plays a key role in keeping us focused on our goals and motivating us to attain them, rewarding our attention and achievement by elevating our mood. That is, we feel good when we work towards our goals.

Dopamine is related to wanting – to desire. The attainment of the object of our desire releases dopamine into our brains and we feel good. Conversely, the frustration of our desires starves us of dopamine, causing anxiety and fear.

One of the greatest of desires is romantic love – the long-lasting, “till death do us part” kind. It’s no surprise, then, that romantic love is sustained, at least in part, through the constant flow of dopamine released in the presence – real or imagined – of our true love. Loss of romantic love cuts off that supply of dopamine, which is why it feels like you’re dying – your brain responds by triggering all sorts of anxiety-related responses.

Herein lies obsession, as we go to ever-increasing lengths in search of that dopamine reward. Stalking specialists warn against any kind of contact with a stalker, positive or negative, because any response at all triggers that reward mechanism. If you let the phone ring 50 times and finally pick up on the 51st ring to tell your stalker off, your stalker gets his or her reward, and learns that all s/he has to do is wait for the phone to ring 51 times.

Romantic love isn’t the only kind of desire that can create this kind of dopamine addiction, though – as Captain Ahab knew well, any suitably important goal can become an obsession once the mind has established ownership.

 

The Neurology of Ownership

Ownership turns out to be about a lot more than just legal rights. When we own something, we invest a part of ourselves into it – it becomes an extension of ourselves.

In a famous experiment at Cornell University, researchers gave students school logo coffee mugs, and then offered to trade them chocolate bars for the mugs. Very few were willing to make the trade, no matter how much they professed to like chocolate. Big deal, right? Maybe they just really liked those mugs!

But when they reversed the experiment, handing out chocolate and then offering to trade mugs for the candy, they found that now, few students were all that interested in the mugs. Apparently the key thing about the mugs or the chocolate wasn’t whether students valued whatever they had in their possession, but simply that they had it in their possession.

This phenomenon is called the “endowment effect”. In a nutshell, the endowment effect occurs when we take ownership of an object (or idea, or person); in becoming “ours” it becomes integrated with our sense of identity, making us reluctant to part with it (losing it is seen as a loss, which triggers that dopamine shut-off I discussed above).

Interestingly, researchers have found that the endowment effect doesn’t require actual ownership or even possession to come into play. In fact, it’s enough to have a reasonable expectation of future possession for us to start thinking of something as a part of us – as jilted lovers, gambling losers, and 7-year olds denied a toy at the store have all experienced.

The Upshot for Goal-Setters

So what does all this mean for would-be achievers?

On one hand, it’s a warning against setting unreasonable goals. The bigger the potential for positive growth a goal has, the more anxiety and stress your brain is going to create around it’s non-achievement.

It also suggests that the common wisdom to limit your goals to a small number of reasonable, attainable objectives is good advice. The more goals you have, the more ends your brain thinks it “owns” and therefore the more grief and fear the absence of those ends is going to cause you.

On a more positive note, the fact that the brain rewards our attentiveness by releasing dopamine means that our brain is working with us to direct us to achievement. Paying attention to your goals feels good, encouraging us to spend more time doing it. This may be why outcome visualization — a favorite technique of self-help gurus involving imagining yourself having completed your objectives — has such a poor track record in clinical studies. It effectively tricks our brain into rewarding us for achieving our goals even though we haven’t done it yet!

But ultimately our brain wants us to achieve our goals, so that it’s sense of who we are can be fulfilled. And that’s pretty good news!

How to stop worrying and lead a stress-free life

How to stop worrying and lead a stress-free life

Can’t stop worrying? Try out our seven ways to beat the bother and boost your happiness. Whilst worrying is necessary for spurring us on to achieve our goals, chronic worrying can disrupt the balance in our nervous system and be detrimental to our health. Here are seven ways to wash away your worries:

How to stop worrying, tip 1: Forget the things you can’t change

If you’re worrying about something that’s happened in the past, you need to stop. The power of your mind isn’t strong enough to solve problems through panic, so it’s important to beat your worries by thinking logically and tackling them head-on. Bad memories from the past are toxic to our health and highly counterproductive so you must bury the burdens of your past and move on.

How to stop worrying, tip 2: Write a worry list

Write down everything you’re worried about; the bills, your job, the car MOT – everything. Then rate them on a scale of one to 10, with 10 being the things that are concerning you most. You can then turn your worry list into an action list. Take action on the worries that you rated the highest first, and then work through the rest of the list. You will feel a sense of relief each time you tick a worry off, and this is a sure-fire way to boost your happiness and relieve your worries.

How to stop worrying, tip 3: Discipline your thoughts

If you’re a chronic worrier, you need to learn to take control of your thoughts rather than letting them take control of you. To do this, every time you think a negative thought, you must turn it into a positive. Every time you worry, think “is this really helpful?” If the answer is no, turn the thought into a positive or forget it completely. Whilst this may seem difficult at first, it will eventually become second nature and you will find that turning a negative into a positive is a much more constructive way of dealing with your thoughts.

How to stop worrying, tip 4: Distract yourself through relaxation

When we’re worried – particularly about a number of things at once – our brains don’t tend to find a logical solution to our problems. In order to think logically, we must take the time to relax and unwind. Breathe in through your nose, and out through your mouth. After a couple of minutes of relaxation, the tension will leave your body and you will be in a better position to tackle the problem from a fresh perspective.

How to stop worrying, tip 5: Talk to friends and family

A problem shared is a problem halved. Talk to your family, your friends, or a doctor if you have a good relationship with them. Sometimes saying your problems out loud can get your thoughts straight in your head and if you’re worrying about something useless, saying it out loud can make you realise that it’s just not worth the worry. With those close to you, you can laugh, cry, and moan as much as you like without being judged and this is a healthy way to relieve stress.

How to stop worrying, tip 6: Confront the problem head-on

Some worries can’t be tamed through talking to others or relaxation. A problem that won’t go away until you physically do something about it needs to be confronted head-on. Sometimes, we have so much on our mind that we don’t know what to deal with first. Make a decision on which problem you want to solve and how you will go about it, and then stick to it. You will probably find that once you resolve the problem, you’ll wish you’d done something about it sooner.

How to stop worrying tip 7: Put things into perspective

Don’t be overwhelmed by small things; try and see the bigger picture. Is your problem really as bad as you’re making it out to be? The chances are there will be many people worse off than you. Instead of zoning in on certain things and panicking about them, put everything into perspective. Does this problem affect your entire life? Will you still be panicking about this in a few weeks or months time? If the answer is no, then it’s really not worth the worry.

Five ways to get lucky

Five ways to get lucky

Get more luck in your life

Ever feel as though some people have more luck than you?  Inject your life with some much needed good fortune. With the aid of positive thinking you can turn that frown upside down, start living your life to its full potential and achieve your dreams, without feeling the need to reach for that scratch card.

Look for the silver lining

It is inevitable that some people seem to get more luck than others, but should we just wait to see if luck strikes for us or take matters into our own hands?  We can help ourselves a lot by looking for the silver lining in a negative situation.  If you focus on the negatives you are only going to cloud your judgment on the solution, so adopt a more positive outlook on the situations in your life and you will feel better about how to handle them and begin to assume a lucky mentality. Change your thoughts and luck will follow.

Be on the lookout for new opportunities

Very rarely do opportunities for luck present themselves; when they do it’s fantastic, but the chances are this is not going to occur. Nine out of 10 times things happen because we make them happen, so why not take some calculated risks to increase your opportunities. Take smaller risks at first and if they pay off you can increase them.  You should always be on the lookout for new prospects, whether it is in the workplace or in your social life. Keep your eyes and ears open as you never know what’s just around the corner and you don’t want to miss out!

Cut loose your anxieties

Individual hang ups can hold us back from doing everyday tasks in our lives.  Adopt the mantra: ‘what’s the worst that could happen?’  Don’t let your anxiety get the better of you; your mind is very powerful and anxiety is just a learnt behavior. Sometimes putting yourself in a stressful situation is OK and to explore new paths in life is essential. Sitting back is all well and good if you’re willing to watch the world go by, but the more open you are to new opportunities the more you’ll increase your chances of luck, so let go of that anxiety and go for it!

Trust your instincts

People who make quick decisions can be led by their intuition.  Your gut instinct is more than likely correct; how many times have you been stuck in a situation where you knew things weren’t right from the off, but still carried on and things have turned sour?  Listening to yourself can really help you make the right decisions.  So how can you become more intuitive?  Take some time for yourself, relax in the bath or go for a walk and clear your head.  Spending time with yourself will help you understand your thoughts clearly; that way when the next decision has to be made you will know exactly what you think and you can manage the situation with a clear decisive answer.

Learn how to deal with bad luck

The way we deal with bad luck can be detrimental to how we view our lives.  A pessimistic person can always see the bad in everything, and to dwell constantly on the bad will inevitably get you down in the dumps.  Try to put a positive spin on all the bad situations you find yourself in; focusing what could have made that situation worse will give you that pick up to see you through the rough patch.  It isn’t possible to always be happy and positive about everything or everyone in your life, but making a concerted effort to have a happier and brighter outlook on life will make you appreciate the luck you already had in your life that you didn’t notice.